I used to think the Bible was pretty cut and dry when it came to sex: no premarital sex, no adultery, and definitely no funny business outside marriage. But something about that didn’t sit right with me. So, I dug deeper, and I found some shocking, bizarre, and downright confusing sexual beliefs in the Good Book that made me say, “Wait, that’s in there???”
Turns out, the Bible isn’t just angels, commandments, and a whole lot of “thou shalt nots.” It has some eyebrow-raising takes on sex and relationships that don’t always get discussed in Sunday school. Let’s talk about some of them.
1. The Bible never actually forbids polygamy
If you think the Bible is strictly a “one man, one woman” kind of book, think again. Some of the most revered figures in the Old Testament had multiple wives. Abraham, Jacob, David, and Solomon, who took it to the extreme with 700 wives and 300 concubines!
Nowhere does the Bible outright condemn polygamy. In fact, Exodus 21:10 even regulates how men should treat multiple wives: “If he marries another woman, he must not deprive the first one of her food, clothing, and marital rights.”
So why do modern Christians frown on it? Well, by the New Testament, church leaders started pushing for monogamy (1 Timothy 3:2), but the old-school patriarchs? They were living their best lives with whole squads of wives.
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2. There’s a law about forced marriage after rape
Here’s one that’s uncomfortable to read: Deuteronomy 22:28-29 says:
“If a man happens to meet a virgin who is not pledged to be married and rapes her and they are discovered, he shall pay her father fifty shekels of silver. He must marry the young woman, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives.”
This law was likely about ensuring financial security for the woman, since virginity was tied to marital value in ancient times, but today, it sounds horrifying. Imagine telling a rape victim, “Congrats, you’re now married to your attacker!”
Thankfully, we’ve evolved past this, but it’s wild to think this was once considered justice.
3. The Bible has rules about semen
Leviticus 15:16-18 gets very specific about bodily fluids:
“When a man has an emission of semen, he must bathe his whole body with water, and he will be unclean till evening. Any clothing or leather that has semen on it must be washed with water, and it will be unclean till evening. When a man has sexual relations with a woman and there is an emission of semen, both of them must bathe with water, and they will be unclean till evening.”
Meaning, if a man has a “nocturnal emission” (wet dream), he’s considered unclean until evening and must wash himself. Even regular marital sex leaves both partners “unclean” until they bathe.
Why? Ancient Israel had strict purity laws, and bodily discharges (yes, even the natural ones) were seen as ritually impure. Imagine having to perform a cleansing ritual just because you and your spouse got busy the night before.
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4. Women were required to marry their brother-in-law
Ever heard of levirate marriage? Deuteronomy 25:5-10 says:
“If brothers are living together and one of them dies without a son, his widow must not marry outside the family. Her husband’s brother shall take her and marry her and fulfill the duty of a brother-in-law to her. The first son she bears shall carry on the name of the dead brother so that his name will not be blotted out from Israel.”
And if the brother refused?
“…then the widow shall go up to him in the presence of the elders, take off one of his sandals, spit in his face and say, ‘This is what is done to the man who will not build up his brother’s family line.’ That man’s line shall be known in Israel as The Family of the Unsandaled.”
This wasn’t about love; it was about property and lineage. Women couldn’t inherit, so this law ensured the deceased man’s name (and estate) lived on. Still, imagine being forced to marry your brother-in-law just because your husband died childless. Mysogynistic much? Thank God for feminism.
5. Premarital sex? Not a big deal (According to Ruth)
Forget what you’ve heard in church, Ruth and Boaz might have been the original “friends with benefits.” In Ruth 3:6-8, Ruth sneaks into Boaz’s bed and uncovers his feet (a euphemism for his… well, you get it).
“When Boaz had finished eating and drinking and was in good spirits, he went over to lie down at the far end of the grain pile. Ruth approached quietly, uncovered his feet and lay down.” Ruth 3:7
While some argue it was a symbolic act, others suggest it was a pre-marriage hookup. This wasn’t your average girl-meets-boy moment. Ruth’s actions were bold and very suggestive, especially for her time. Either way, God didn’t strike them down with a lightning bolt. In fact, Boaz marries her, and their great-grandson turns out to be King David. So, maybe God’s okay with a little pre-marital action after all?
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The Bible’s sexual ethics are complicated
Some of these beliefs make sense in their ancient context, while others are downright shocking today. Biblical sexual ethics weren’t always as black-and-white as we assume.
So, the next time someone says, “The Bible is clear about sex,” you can smile and say, “Oh, really? Let me tell you about the semen laws…” *smirk*
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